It ...seems to be his appearance, which is strange because he looks the same as I remember...?
[But that was so long ago. His state of mind has been altered so much since then. Are his memories just lacking? No, no, it can't possibly be that. His memories are razor sharp, and always have been. So what.]
[And then Shadow Milk jumps out of his chair, Startled, eyes looking around wild though they can't see anything.]
[That was his voice, he knows it. He heard it, where the FUCK did that come from?]
[He doesn't know, he wants to say, because he lost his access to All Knowledge and has no way to just pull the info he needs. Instead he's looking blindly around the kitchen for the source of the voice looking somewhere between panicked and furious.]
-You heard it, didn't you?! I know I heard his voice! Where is he!?
( lily falters- but if he heard it too... there's no maneuvering her way out of that. )
I've been experiencing hallucinations- from the stress, I would imagine. ( for weeks now. but still. ) ... I'm taking care of myself in hopes of reducing it, but- it's mostly just... my husbands.
[Hallucinations from stress. Is that True, though? Does that read as Deceit? He does look, because while sure, he could believe that, it doesn't seem Right.]
[Is he worried...? No, he shouldn't be. This isn't his business. He's probably the one at fault for her stress anyway.]
If you hear him again, tell him I've got a bone to pick with him.
[Hm. Noted. Filed away. Something he will stick his nose into late-]
[You can almost hear the record scratch, the way Shadow Milk's hackles immediately rise when he actually gets a response from the hallucination. there is a dark fury that comes over him, something hot in his blood. A violence he has not felt in some time.]
[When he speaks his voice drips in malice.]
If I'm to be sent back to Hell then it will be to greet you, you treacherous worm!
[Is he aware that its a false illusion? yes. Does he care? Absolutely not. He's been holding his tongue about Elder Faerie for so long out of respect for the Guardian and the roof over his head but Creators alive what can he do when its right there.]
( lily's not one to raise her voice- but it isn't out of anger, really. more- worry? anxiety? she takes her arm in both of her own, tries to ground him. she is real- elder faerie... isn't.
even if sometimes, despite the cruel things he says, she wishes he were. )
Don't encourage it, please... They always love to argue.
( elder faerie makes a soft tsk, shaking his head in disappointment.
Perhaps I thought wrong of you, White Lily Cookie. )
[He chokes down whatever nasty thing he was going to say next when she raises her voice at him. He's expecting anger, but her tone isn't, so it catches him off guard. Sends an uncomfortable feeling through him.]
[He simmers down a little, but the way his hair boils like water and the shadows in the room with them start to writhe, he's still all but willing to continue.]
They should learn to hold their tongue when I can hear. Had I not been sealed I could wipe whatever cognitive cancer is clinging to you out with just a thought.
[Really. Really, did you think he would not respond to that one too? He doesn't rile up like before at least, though his hair begins to move again. His voice instead, is just low and dangerous. His voice like a snake, full of venom.]
Did you think wrong? Of shackling the virtue of Freedom to a position utterly antithetical to her calling? How utterly cruel, and because you were too weak to withstand your comeuppance for what you did. You are the biggest fiend of them all and you always have been, Fool King.
( lily stares, stunned for a moment- and it seems that elder faerie has no response because he soon fades from her vision. a sign that he has no answer to the accusation? or that she simply cannot fathom one for the plague in her mind to build off of? she doesn't know.
after a moment, she lets go of his arm and instead wraps her arms around his chest, tight and thankful and begging for comfort all at once. )
... It's faded now. ... I- ... Thank you. For standing up for me.
( she loves elder faerie. she doesn't think she could stop, even with cruel visions and whispers in her ear; the hallucinations aren't him, after all. but- to become the guardian has been a heavy burden that she could no longer ignore with the arrival of shadow milk cookie.
to have this acknowledged was- not something she thought possible. she would have endured quietly, it was only right that she take responsibility somehow. but... )
[He's gone. Not that he can see him, but the sense is gone, the heaviness in the air has lifted. His hair falls flat, the shadows recede. He takes a deep breath but then scoffs, though he does nothing to dissuade her hold around him. If anything he seems to sink into it. An anchor of sorts for him just as much her.]
Once more, someone is unable to handle the bitterness of Truth and turns away! Pathetic.
[Hm. He did sure say all of that though. It's funny, he had fully intended on saying this to her in an act of cruelty before. And yet it came out in her defense. How strange their lives have become.]
...Anyway, you're just lucky I can't stand that guy, that's all!
I'm sure I am. ... I- know it's not real. I know it's not what they truly think of me. ( though sometimes it starts to form cracks in her heart. ) But... you saying something was still nice.
( she inhales softly, tightening the hug a little. it's shifting slowly- from relief to gratitude to affection. )
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
cw: hallucinations
[But that was so long ago. His state of mind has been altered so much since then. Are his memories just lacking? No, no, it can't possibly be that. His memories are razor sharp, and always have been. So what.]
[And then Shadow Milk jumps out of his chair, Startled, eyes looking around wild though they can't see anything.]
[That was his voice, he knows it. He heard it, where the FUCK did that come from?]
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( and then shadow milk reacts like a cat that just got it's tail stepped on and she blinks- )
Shadow Milk Cookie? Is everything okay?
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-You heard it, didn't you?! I know I heard his voice! Where is he!?
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...
You heard it, too?
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[There’s a. Startled pause before Shadow Milk reaches out a hand and calls his staff.]
[No sign of the Fool King…]
What was that.
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I've been experiencing hallucinations- from the stress, I would imagine. ( for weeks now. but still. ) ... I'm taking care of myself in hopes of reducing it, but- it's mostly just... my husbands.
( and she... wants to see them. )
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[Is he worried...? No, he shouldn't be. This isn't his business. He's probably the one at fault for her stress anyway.]
If you hear him again, tell him I've got a bone to pick with him.
[Which husband? yes.]
Foolish Kings, all of them.
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( is it True? that's a good question, and the answer is...
no. but even she has lies she'll cling to for comfort, because the truth is so much worse. even she has her weaknesses.
if the beholder has its eye on her, however, he'll know that something is actively wrapping itself around her eyes, even now:
I am aware, Beast. Your folly continues, and I will be glad to see you back in the pits of Hell.
and then lily huffs. )
No, no, we aren't doing this, I am not going to be the middle man of a fight between a grown Cookie and a hallucination--
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[You can almost hear the record scratch, the way Shadow Milk's hackles immediately rise when he actually gets a response from the hallucination. there is a dark fury that comes over him, something hot in his blood. A violence he has not felt in some time.]
[When he speaks his voice drips in malice.]
If I'm to be sent back to Hell then it will be to greet you, you treacherous worm!
[Is he aware that its a false illusion? yes. Does he care? Absolutely not. He's been holding his tongue about Elder Faerie for so long out of respect for the Guardian and the roof over his head but Creators alive what can he do when its right there.]
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( lily's not one to raise her voice- but it isn't out of anger, really. more- worry? anxiety? she takes her arm in both of her own, tries to ground him. she is real- elder faerie... isn't.
even if sometimes, despite the cruel things he says, she wishes he were. )
Don't encourage it, please... They always love to argue.
( elder faerie makes a soft tsk, shaking his head in disappointment.
Perhaps I thought wrong of you, White Lily Cookie. )
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[He simmers down a little, but the way his hair boils like water and the shadows in the room with them start to writhe, he's still all but willing to continue.]
They should learn to hold their tongue when I can hear. Had I not been sealed I could wipe whatever cognitive cancer is clinging to you out with just a thought.
[Really. Really, did you think he would not respond to that one too? He doesn't rile up like before at least, though his hair begins to move again. His voice instead, is just low and dangerous. His voice like a snake, full of venom.]
Did you think wrong? Of shackling the virtue of Freedom to a position utterly antithetical to her calling? How utterly cruel, and because you were too weak to withstand your comeuppance for what you did. You are the biggest fiend of them all and you always have been, Fool King.
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after a moment, she lets go of his arm and instead wraps her arms around his chest, tight and thankful and begging for comfort all at once. )
... It's faded now. ... I- ... Thank you. For standing up for me.
( she loves elder faerie. she doesn't think she could stop, even with cruel visions and whispers in her ear; the hallucinations aren't him, after all. but- to become the guardian has been a heavy burden that she could no longer ignore with the arrival of shadow milk cookie.
to have this acknowledged was- not something she thought possible. she would have endured quietly, it was only right that she take responsibility somehow. but... )
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Once more, someone is unable to handle the bitterness of Truth and turns away! Pathetic.
[Hm. He did sure say all of that though. It's funny, he had fully intended on saying this to her in an act of cruelty before. And yet it came out in her defense. How strange their lives have become.]
...Anyway, you're just lucky I can't stand that guy, that's all!
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( she inhales softly, tightening the hug a little. it's shifting slowly- from relief to gratitude to affection. )
They always fade after a while regardless.